One complaint about twitter (and other websites which I have less experience with, e.g. Facebook) is that they provide a sham of real connection: you’re not really friends with all of those people, it’s just a sort of faux intimacy.
This is true, but it’s actually a strength rather than a virtue, and being at a conference really brings that home to me. Sure, it’s possible that there are people that I’ll meet here with whom I’ll feel a mutual immediate strong connection. But what’s a lot more likely is that I’ll run into many more people whom I’ve enjoyed my interactions with, whom I would like to have some contact with in the future, but whom I’m not likely to even start exchanging e-mails with, let alone call or visit them.
And the perfect thing for me to do in that situation is the combination of following them on twitter (as a sort of small-talk chit-chat way of getting to know them) and of subscribing to their blog (to get to know how they think in a more deeper way). Maybe I’ll get bored in a few weeks, in which case no big deal; maybe, though, I’ll find myself looking forward to what they have to say, maybe they’ll reciprocate with me, maybe we’ll find ourselves looking forward to our conversations in those fora.
Certainly there are many people that I follow on twitter whom I would be more than happy to get together with should we be in the same city at some point, but for whom that wasn’t the case when I first became aware of them, and for whom I’m fairly sure that both of those feelings are reciprocated. And I don’t know how I would have figured that out without these media. For that matter, there’s no reason why uncovering a deeper connection should be the end goal: there are also people that I’m perfectly happy to stay in loose contact with via these more tenuous connections, perhaps exchanging the occasional e-mail if there’s something prompting that, but with no further deeper contact. These media are opening up new Levels of Scale in the space of possible connections; that’s a good thing, no?
Post Revisions:
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I’ve only recently started using Twitter heavily, but it has become important to my social interactions.
As you say, following someone’s blog and Twitter feed is a surprisingly aposite way of coming to appreciate their ways of thinking and the things you may have in common with them.
In my head, it seems as though almost everyone who blogs works constantly in a position which requires that they travel across the US a lot for meeting after meeting with their Blackberry/iPhone/netbook in tow, and vice versa. I can’t relate to this world, but I’m sure that Twitter is all the more useful in it, in that you can always scribble down the URL of person X’s Twitter feed now for when you’re less busy.
I would argue that it’s different with Facebook. I carefully screen those I follow on Twitter, making sure I only pay attention to a feed when it is especially informative or interesting. My Facebook account is almost useless, since none of the people who surround me geographically have particularly interesting lives. I have no wish to waste my precious time trawling through each night’s barrage of drunken photographs, for example.
The intimacy of Twitter, though still superficial, is more worth my while: real discussions have happened over Twitter, even if they’re just sparks before the fire of a blog post, or ‘I did this mundane thing today’ tweets. Furthermore, my use of Twitter has been central to making me feel like part of a community (though perhaps that’s premature, or artificial, or both), a sense which I never really got from Facebook.
I’m skeptical of using the term ‘strong connection’ with reference to those I am exclusively in touch with through online social networking, but I can imagine such bonds forming, and I often flatter myself that the intellectual/superficial/otherwise discussions I’m having on the internet help to foster some fraction of an emotional bond between blogger and commenter, or between tweeter and tweetee.
As you say, new forms of social interaction online pave the way for the expression of more nuanced human relationships over the internet. I’m optimistic about the future of social networking apps, even though I hate Facebook.
11/3/2008 @ 5:36 pm
Huh, sounds like I’m not alone in lots of my feelings on this. Interesting to hear about how Facebook feels less useful/nourishing to you; as a non-user, I don’t really have much of a feel for it.
For what it’s worth, I very rarely travel these days; this is the second non-local conference I’ve gone to in six years. I do follow several people who do; by doing so, I have gotten more evidence that it wouldn’t be the right choice for me right now, though…
11/3/2008 @ 8:57 pm
I agree with Spencer about Facebook. Aside from keeping track of major changes in old friend’s lives who I’ll probably never speak to again, it’s fairly useless. The only benefit I receive from it is the false sense that any of my friends care about what I have posted there :) I still check it fairly religiously though, so as long as I’m entertaining myself I’ll continue to use it.
I haven’t used Twitter yet, because I’m scared of having something in addition to these newly discovered blogs to suck up my time, but I’m sure I will succumb eventually. I really like the idea of preliminary conversations that spark blog ideas, and the feeling of being part of a community, so maybe I’m already convinced.
Also, David, I’d like to thank you for teaching me a new word. Now I just need to find a way to use “fora” as many times as possible today! :)
11/4/2008 @ 7:22 am
I love facebook, but so far I only have connections with people I have cared about over the years.
I have only a few people on there that I have only had peripheral contact with. Not to defend the whole thing… but they do put tools in there to deal with not having to see all the silly posts (click ‘less from this user’).
I actually have more of a problem of occasionally going through my friend list and making sure to ping people I do care about. People who contribute less but who I desperately don’t want to forget / lose contact with.
And I’d love to see you over there David! (Really I just wish there was ONE app out there. I got FB + myspace and the latter drives me up the wall.)
11/14/2008 @ 9:26 am